Wednesday, November 9, 2016

Wait! Before You Buy That Weave from AliExpress Read This!

First off, I love Doll Face Barbie and this is not about him. This is about buying weave from vendors.

Doll Face Barbie has one of the best install videos on YouTube. I watch his videos with envy as he flips through his hair and lip syncs to popular songs on the videos.

The hair that he gets FOR FREE most of the time, he installs and does a review video. Now again, I LOVE DOLL FACE BARBIE, but I want you to think about this for a second. DFB gets tons of hair for free. His installs don’t really last longer than four weeks. Most of you buying hair from AliExpress will be wearing the hair that you purchase much longer than this. You will be wearing this weave and be doing many things to it: cutting curling, etc.

DFB can afford this. Many of you can not. Many of you lovely ladies are in school and are trying to do better for yourselves while being the Goddesses that you are. But DFB will have a new install in a few weeks. Chances are, you’ll be wearing the same one.

Choose your vendors wisely.

On DFB videos, there are comments under this beautiful hair where women are complaining about the bad quality of some of the hair. Does DFB just get a better batch? Perhaps. Or it could be that he’s only wearing that hair once or twice.

Make sure you get more reviews before spending your hair earned  money.
DFB is fabulous beyond words. I love him and his positive message. I’m just asking you to take a step back for a minute and make sure you know wha you’re purchasing first. Don’t go off one review. DFB always looks fabulous no matter what. Make sure you do as well.

Friday, October 28, 2016

Please Wash Your Weave Ladies...Please!?!?!?

I have not singled out a race in this blog post. Why? Because when things go wrong, people always want to blame Black women to make us look bad for whatever reason they may have. 

There are tons of women that get sew in weaves and do not have the slightest clue what to do once they are installed.

So they do nothing but make sure that it looks good. They’ll take a flat iron or some curlers to their hair but they forget about the upkeep. I used to be like that. I was scared of washing my hair because I thought that I would mess something up.

There is this myth that Black women don’t wash their hair at all or very little. Well, that’s not really true. Due to the nature of our hair, daily washing is not necessary.

Oily and greasy hair is the result of not washing for those with straight hair. Curly hair?  Not So much!

Her hair was so matted up it had to be cut off!

So SOME Black women don’t wash their hair when it’s in a weave because they are not sure how to take care of it OR they are afraid they will mess up the style. This is what happens when you leave a weave in for an extended period of time. 

Your hair is GROWING. UNDER THOSE STITCHES. Since it’s braided up, it’s going to get matted and twisted up. There is little to do to save the hair underneath. So, this must be removed once the hair is matted.  

There is a legacy with Black women. Men like Tommy Sotomayor ignores this legacy when he makes ignorant videos about Black women JUST to get views for his channel,  but he doesn't realize the damage that he is doing to women of color and young men of color that watch his videos and are influenced. 

Our grandmothers did the same to our mothers. “Nappy headed gal!” “Good hair” are terms they grew up hearing. Then we grew up hearing the same things. That our worth was because of the hair on our heads. Parameters were set for ‘good’ and ‘bad’ hair and we were off! Generations of black women had their beauty confiscated from them. 

FAST FORWARD TO TODAY...Black women began to wear weave. Some because they like the style, others because it’s a protective style, but some of them are ashamed of their hair and how it won’t grow. It’s true. Some women are ashamed of the way it looks. I was one of those women. But instead of trying to lift these women up, Mr. Sotomayor drags them back down in the mud. 
It is important that if you’re going to wear a weave, you need to take care of it. Washing your hair is important. IT’s also important that you don’t keep the weave in for too long because your hair is still growing and it will tangle in with the hair and the stitches. So please wash your hair. 

Some women use a squirt bottle with shampoo and water to get under closures and full sew ins. The challenge is to make sure it’s DRY so sit under a dryer!!! So MILDEW doesn’t set in. It will. You have to cut that out.

  • IT’S important that you WASH your hair. 
  • Use a squirt bottle with shampoo and water to get under closures and full sew ins
  • Make sure the hair is super DRY. If you have a closure or a full sew in, a sit under dryer is imperative so you won’t get mildew.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

The Mother That Used Too Much Coconut Oil In Her Child’s Hair ClapsBack!

This is Tionna. Her daughter is a happy Black child with gorgeous natural hair. We know that Tionna is a great mother, not only because her child is healthy and happy, she uses coconut oil in her child’s hair. 

This is a mom that knows what’s up, ookkkkaaaaayyyy?

However, one day she got a note from school from the teacher. Apparently, some of the kids decided to tease her daughter Amia because her hair “stunk”. She asked if she not use so much coconut hair in her daughter’s hair because of the smell and so that the other children wouldn’t tease her all day. 

Tionna flipped a gasket. As many parents would. 
“If you have to apply this daily – please do so lightly, so the kid’s (sic) don’t tease her."

Really? This woman is a teacher and I’ve spotted a few grammatical errors in the letter already.

"Tionna says that she’s been using the same hair grease on Amia’s hair for years but, ironically, the letter came on a day when she’d been sent to school after using a Wash ‘n’ Go shampoo that had merely contained coconut – not actual coconut oil.
Read more:

Tionna shared this post online and it went viral. Since the teacher offered an “apology” of sorts. Here is the post that Tionna shared after speaking with Carol the Teacher.....

Carol acted as if she was truly sorry for what happened. But let's be honest, we all know carol would have not cared if the post did not go viral. She does not give a damn about how I feel or how her employee made me feel!!!! All she cares about is her business and her reputation. All I care about is my child!!!! She keep calling me telling me what I need to do. That's the reason all this happened, you telling me what I NEED to do. Let's for the sake of argument say Amia's hair did stink and the bullying really did happen (but it didn't) the letter should have read. "Ms. Norris, an incident occurred at school today where the children teased Amia's hair because they were unfamiliar with the smell. I corrected the issue, we had a lesson about culture and why Amia's hair is different, the other parents were notified and I just wanted to let you know what transpired today." Then, leave it up to me to decide rather or not I want to use a different oil!!!! You ignorant A-hole!!! My child will never be returning there. That whole damn school need to be SHUT DOWN. Sincerely, a pissed off mom! How dare you ever disrespect me and my daughter like that????? And then blame it on the children? PATHETIC! Oh and carol "THANK YOU FOR UNDERSTANDING" πŸ–•πŸΎπŸ–•πŸΎπŸ–•πŸΎπŸ–•πŸΎπŸ–•πŸΎ552

Here is the thing. Instead of telling this child to not wear so much coconut oil, which smells awesome if you ask me, how about use this as a opportunity to teach the kids to not tease other kids? How about we stop teaching our children to conform to the ideals of other people in order to fit in vs. being individuals and doing what’s best for them. That’s a novel ideal, right?

Hats off to Tionna for setting this teacher right! What is wrong with this woman? Coconut oil smells divine and we need to teach kids that it’s not alright to bully others because of things they may not understand. Too bad these kids don’t understand the wonderfulness of coconut oil. That should be part of the lesson plan.

ETA: Tionna didn’t use coconut oil on her daughter’s head but a product that used coconut oil as an ingredient. 

Friday, October 21, 2016

Let’s Talk Sew In Tips: For the New School Of Sew Ins

Back in the day, we didn’t talk about weaves. They were a secret. We wore weaves that were “believable”. One didn’t come to work with a twenty six inch weave going to work when just yesterday, she had a Halle Berry cut. You would have been laughed out of school or the office.

Today, weaves are longer than Donald Trump’s tax return (maybe..we haven’t seen it.) And in 2016, it’s no big deal. The longer the hair, the bigger the Diva. This was not true in the 80’s and 90’s. The more light your skin was, the more people would think it was you hair strangely. The darker, can forget about it. Give it up. No one will ever believe that’s yours with dark skin.

However, today, weaves are a lot different. Bundles used to have a lot of hair. Nowadays, they barely put enough in one bundle for a sew in. Back in the day, a bundle would have enough hair for a sew in today. Not any longer. THey’ve gotten smaller and smaller. To where you’d need three and four bundles of hair for a great and thick sew in.

Today, these are tips that you need for a sew in in this day and age.

1. Stop your stylists from chopping up your hair weave!

Hair weaves are expensive. They are car note payments. When you chop up these extensions, you’re creating shedding. When you cut the weft, the hair will shed. SHED. Before long, your expensive hair wefts will be balding. Every time you comb your hair weave, hair will fall into the sink. Tell your stylist to FOLD THE TRACK at the edge instead of cut the track. If you’ve spent a pretty penny for your hair weave, you don’t want the weft to bald. You want that hair to stay as long as you can. So please. Tell your stylist to preserve the wefts. Don’t cut the track. Fold the track.

2. Vixens Aren’t Worth It..

Yes you can wear pigtails. However, if you’ve purchased expensive hair, you MUST cut the wefts to achieve this style. Is it worth it? Stylists also charge a lot of money for these styles. IT’S A PARTIAL WEAVE if you think about it. Yes, there is some intricate braiding going on, but they are charging your for a partial sew in, not a FULL sew in. So why so much? Are they charging you for the versatility? A stylist should always get paid for their work but lets be honest here. A vixen sew in is a partial sew in.

3. Stop perming your entire hair for a sew in!

Yes you want your hair to be IT! You want people to sing Hallelujah when they see your hair. But again, you don’t want to be bald when you take your hair down. NO. If you have worn full sew ins back to back to back, why are you putting chemicals in your head again? There is no need for it. If you’re getting a vixen, then you can perm the leave out however, there will be a chance that you will over process your hair if you don't remember where the leave out was when you do the perm for the rest of your hair. There is no need for chemicals when your hair is all put away. When you decide to relax the sew ins from doing them back to back, THEN you can perm all of your hair. No need to relax all of your hair and then put a full sew in on top of that. You can perm your edges and that’s it.

4. Reuse Your hair!

I can’t believe I have to say this. But re-use the hair as much as you can. You spent the money. Now reuse the weave! Re use it until you can no longer do so and then retire her in a nice grave. It’s your money. Get more bang for your buck. I told my sister to re use her weave and she never listened to me. Now she’s not sure what to do. She needs to wear a weave  due to unfortunate hair loss. However she didn’t reuse the hair and would have to purchase new hair, creating a drain on her finances. She doesn’t listen to anything that I tell her so perhaps I should stop telling her, huh? But that doesn’t mean I have to stop telling YOU.

Tuesday, October 18, 2016

Texlaxing Worth It?

What do you do when you want to keep your hair’s texture but you want to straighten the curl pattern more? For those of you that are 4B and 4C, sometimes you just need a better way to maintain your hair AND you don’t mind the use of chemicals to do so.

Introducing Texlaxing. We’ve talked about this before. For a while, I texlaxed. 

But here are the Pros and Cons

This is my niece with her hair just texlaxed. She needs a corrective texlaxing.It didn’t take as well.


You get hair that is manageable.
You get to maintain your curl pattern. 
You get the best of both worlds. 
Your hair gets straighter quickly.


Even though when your hair gets wet and curly, you can’t call yourself a “natural” any longer even though you look natural. 

If you overprocess, your hair will get straight. If you under process, it won’t do much good. You’ve put chemcicals in your hair for no good reason.

You can overprocess in some areas and under process in others, leaving different textures all over your head. 

This is my niece. She is texlaxing her hair. As you can see that her curls hang down her back. Before, that didn’t happen. Her curl pattern was very tight. Her shrinkage is off the charts however. But when we did her texlaxing, her hair began hanging down to her shoulders. However, we still under processed the hair and it’s back to curly. It’s almost in some ways like we did nothing to it. 

applying the creamy crack AKA relaxer

If your hair porosity is off, then putting chemicals in it could make things worse.  With hair that is over porous  the chemicals will work quickly! So you must work fast when doing a relaxed or else the results will make your hair straight. If your hair is low porosity, then the chemical process will take more time. It could take longer to get the results that you want. Therefore, there could be a problem with your hair getting too straight in some areas and not straight enough in other areas. So the porosity of your hair will be important. Someone with high porosity and wanting to add color don’t have to wait long for the color to take. Vice versa with low porosity.

Be careful when adding chemicals to your hair. You should only texlax once or twice a year. Let your new growth be at least three inches long before you do anything. If you relax your hair every eight weeks you need a whooping. Retain the hair that you grow. It’s a great option for those that want to maintain their curl pattern but loosen it just a bit. I loved it. 

Monday, October 17, 2016

Fake Ass Hair Ads On The Internet and Why You Should Stay Away

Hi Michelle. But this is not Michelle. I know this person actually and that’s not her name. These pictures have been stolen in order to get you to buy their product.

But look more closely. Moroccan Argan Oil can’t make your hair grow. It can make your hair manageable but not grow. Taking care of your hair by doing good things and drinking water and eating good food is the way to hair growth. There is no product over night that will make you Rapunzel.

Just beware of these companies that steal pictures to try and sell you something. Your hair will grow when you take the time out to take care of it. It will take care of you. I had learned this lesson the hard way and I had many bumps on the road. Now I’m surprised when I feel something on my back. I realize now that it’s MY hair. That’s a wonderful feeling.

Friday, October 14, 2016

How To Grow Your Edges Back


It is the rallying cry of many women of color.
It is a great “Clap back” when you’re insulting someone. Just go after their edges and you’ll win the battle in the insults when it comes to women of color.

But why are your edges disappearing in the first place

Many reasons.


Lupus, alopecia, thyroid problems...these diseases and illnesses can thin your hair along with your edges. I know that this problem exists for me, in the front of my hair. Discoid lesions pop up in my scalp often and thins my hair out in the very front. Those with thyroid problems can have issues with hair thinning as well. Certain medications can contribute to this.


Either your life is not going well or you’re playing with your hair too much. Stress mentally and physically can make your edges disappear.


That weave is pulling your hair and that ponytail is too tight. Leave these things alone! Loosen up your hair and stop piling that gel into your hair. It’s thinning your edges. You need to sleep with the proper protection.

What can I do to bring my edges back?

Use a Growth Aid -- Find a good growth aid and apply this to your edges. I use a Monistat mixture that can help with hair growth all over. For those that have followed by blog, you know that I gained an additional inch + with my hair!

Scalp Massages   Grab some Jamaican Black Castor Oil and massage those edges ladies. Make sure you do a scalp massage every night.

Low Manipulation Styles  Wear styles where your hands are not always in your hair. Do your hair and forget about it! You don’t want to wear styles that need constant upkeep.

Vitamins-- Take Vitamin E B12, C, and Biotin. IT’S important that you put good things inside of you if you want good things to come out of your scalp. Drink lots of water!!!! Your hair and skin will thank you for it!

Stay Away From Edge Control and Gel-- This stuff is MURDER on your edges. Stick with water, beeswax and a SCARF to keep your edges sleek. The scarf should not be so tight that your eyes bulge out of your head and should only be applied for fifteen minutes. If you have to use gel, use a light one that doesn’t have alcohol. VERY LITTLE AMOUNT. The size of a dime. Some of ya’ll get crazy with it. You don’t need to dip your hand in the bottle of gel.

Stop! Drop the hot comb! You need to focus on styles that are low manipulation. Be careful with wigs that have combs at the edges. These things will rip your hair right out of your head. Treat your edges like lace for a few months (well do this as a lifestyle change) and you’ll see your edges growing back. If they don’t, then you may be looking at permanent damage and see a dermatologist.

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