Sorry But You're A Natural Hair Na....Tyrant: 5 Ways to tell if You're Simply Overdoing It

I understand that the "Nazi" term is offensive to many people for obvious reasons. The Nazi party was responsible for some of the most brutal crimes in modern history. So I'm changing it up to Natural Hair Tyrants.  They take natural hair to the EXTREME.

You know you're a Natural Hair Tyrant when you find yourself...

1. Thumbing down YouTube Videos where the vlogger is sporting a silky straight 24 inch lacefront.
You then spend a good chunk of time debating with the other commenters that call you a hater when all you want to do is enlighten the poor lacefront vlogger that you just unsubscribed to.

2. You believe that all (black) women that wear weaves hate themselves in some form or fashion and just need the form of the Big Chop, some moisturizer, and grapeseed oil. But you make no mention of when white women wear weaves and wigs, or the fact that many of them wear perms to alter their hair texture...but then again....why would that bother you? (rolls eyes)

3. Refuse to listen to Nicki Minaj, no matter how much you like her new hit, because you've never seen what her hair looks like under all of her wigs and lacefronts.

4. You find yourself attacking "Pro-Weave" blogs. You make cringe-worthy comments like, "Ugh...I shudder when I think about wearing someone else's hair on my head!" "Why can't Black women be more accepting of themselves and love what comes out of their head?" Even though you ignore the fact that other races act in the same manner with different things like tanning, perms, curling irons, etc. 

5. The minute you became natural became the most important day to you besides your birthday and maybe the birthdate of your child. You realize that this was the first day you began your "Hair Journey" but you fail to realize that perhaps the rest of the world hasn't quite gotten where you are yet and that everyone may not come to the same realizations as you have.

6. A relaxer is a weapon of mass destruction in your book.

7. The last time you used a blowdryer, it was to dry that cute Afro's Rock T-shirt that you just pulled out the washing machine or your iPhone that you just dropped in the toilet.

8. You think Madame CJ Walker isn't all that great. ( Even though she did NOT create the perm which was a German man or create the hot comb)

9. You're convinced that mineral oil was created by Satan.

10. Most of your time is spent in the hair care aisle and you've been sitting there for the last twenty minutes reading labels of products.

If any of these statements appealed to you, let me leave you with a few points. The only person in your life that you control is you. I wrote a post a few days ago that dealt with a blogger claiming that a weave is not a protective style. She was being derisive by pairing Naturals against each other. Those that wear weave and those that don't. 

It was ridiculous, especially reading the comments section . Apparently many people feel the same way and it showed in the comments box. If one wanted to be persnickety about what being "Natural" truly means then....

Making a few assumptions here . Because you wear a weave, you have a ghetto name and no intelligence. You will sit in a beauty supply all day long and fight for the last pack of Remi. Hell, you're going out tonight and need some fly hair. 

On the other hand, if you are natural, then you will be okay. Making bad assumptions about people who wear weave is just as bad as making good assumptions about people who are natural. There seems to be an entire movement dedicated to making all things natural. Some have extended it to every part of their lives and assume that all naturals feel that way. Some people are natural because they simply can't tolerate perms or have been so all their lives and can't imagine anything different. They just realize that sometimes there is more to life than hair, and they certainly aren't concerned with what other people do in their own homes. 

I'm certainly not. 

There was a time in life when  Blacks started moving away from loving their natural hair to embracing other textures. There was a time when a woman wearing natural hair would be criticized for not having a relaxer. Wait, who am I kidding, this still goes on today! LOL. Many people still feel this way. 

Remember on the television show, Martin, where Martin would make fun of Pam's "beady-beads"? He was referring to the fact that she needed to straighten out her kitchen, or the back of her head because it was nappy. That word took on another meaning soon, and many women would make sure that their "kitchen" was silky smooth before leaving the house.

People choosing to be natural were in an alien like world. I mean who would want to go outside looking like that, right? (sarcasm for those that don't get sarcasm on the internet)

Well look at how the tables have turned. Naturals are now the ones praised for their conscious choice leaving many sistas to start privately relaxing their hair while everyone around them has "seen the light". 

A strange world we live in. 

Are naturals enacting revenge for the many years of oppression? Maybe not. 
But I certainly can understand how some of them may feel. 
Regardless, people should wear their hair however they want to.  Worry about your own hair and your own choices. If you can't, and still find yourself caring about what your next door neighbor is doing, then you need to get more of a life. 


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